Chapter Five:
On Indestructible Faith and
Destructible Faith
Alexey thought a lot about what he had seen and learned lately. He thought about the schism in the church, about the multiple divergences in beliefs even among those who were now called “schismatics”, about how the decrees on “eradicating heresies” are written and how they are interpreted and even more terribly hardened by the people who are endowed with the power to execute them, about the weak-willed and thoughtless obedience of some people and about the incomprehensible cruelty of others…
He thought about a person’s willingness to accept death for his or her faith…
He also thought about how the ongoing persecutions could be stopped: “Is only one faith necessary for all? Is it possible for there to be no hostility and intolerance in the faith among people? And what is faith in general?”
Once Alexey asked the elder Nicholas:
“Why is there so much hostility between people, so much hatred due to faith?
“And what is faith in general?”
“Faith is a great power! This power grows out from the mind — into the soul.
“One who has strong faith — it’s easy for such man to live! It is — like a small leaf on a tree branch feeling the same as the whole tree!
“Faith is the power that holds this leaf together with the twig and with the tree itself. And if faith is weak, then this man is like a leaf which was separated from a branch and is driven by the wind: to one disastrous place it will be brought, then to another…
“Our monastic happiness is simple: we must always live by the soul — with the Lord! The soul joins with God — through deep faith and pure love!
“And God’s Love is the wonderful Power that feeds the soul and as if knits it with the Creator!
“The human body is like a leaf on that Tree of God.
“Time is given to this little leaf-body to blossom, turn green, turn yellow, and perish… And the soul — remains inseparable from God, if it has become filled with love for the Lord during its life, if it has grown fast to God! And if the soul has not grown fast to the Lord — then it, as well as the body, is perishable like how a fallen leaf may perish…
“And what benefit the tree had from that leaf — it is no longer your concern.
“At your hour you were born, at your hour you will accept death! And God will judge by merit: are you worthy of the Heavenly Kingdom — or not…”
“And how to know: what is good for God — and what is not?”
“It is namely the secret of the heart prayer! When you feel God in your heart — then you understand His Will! That’s why joy comes — when you obey Him! You yourself have already experienced this many times…
“And if you have conceived something incorrectly — then it will be felt like a sky that is darkly clouded. You will also feel as if it is not joyful — it means that the Lord does not want what you have planned!
“He is above all of us: including, above one’s life and above all our destinies!”
“And does this mean that nothing depends on the person in his or her own destiny? Can’t one change anything, can’t one help anyone else? Has one just to believe, to love — and that’s all? So — like a plant — only both to live and to die?”
“How does it ‘not depend’? It does depend! To abase pride in oneself, to eradicate vices, not to sin due to weakness of will, not to give way to one’s own wrong desires, to master the heart love and how to apprehend the Will of God! All this depends on a person only! And it is befitting to live in this way — such that everything is only for God! And the rest — He will rule!
“Joyful is such a life with God, when by His Will you live!
“Joy happens when God is in your spiritual heart! This is already more than just faith…
“When God’s Love overfills the soul, then you are not separated from God: He is with you and you are with Him! And your life — belongs to Him completely!
“Let everything be with us — according to His Will! And, in such a case, nothing is sad, everything is joyful, if you understand that everything comes from Him! And it is inappropriate for us to resist His Will!”
“And how do we always know that we understand His Will correctly and that we are not mistaken? Just look at how many interpretations people have come up with for every word of Scripture! How much evil is done — ostensibly for God!…”
“You, Alexey, should not worry too much about this!… You — feel by the heart! You already know — how! So — you will always feel the Truth of God with your heart even when your understanding is unable to do so!
“Faith and love for God allow one to not fear the death of the body. And — to worthily pass all the tests that happen in life. They also allow one to do the good that is in one’s power and to not have sorrow for that which you are not able to change.
“And more importantly — always remember about the hour of death. Man should understand that everyone — in his or her own hour — will give answer before the Lord.
“Life is of great value! This is the truth!
“And often a worldly man thinks that nothing is beyond the life of the body… But a spiritual person knows the reason to give bodily life for the sake of saving the soul. And many people did it!
“There is a special state of the human soul, in which faith is so strong and deep, in which faith and love have so transformed the soul — that one does not fear for oneself anymore.
“To transcend the conventional dogmas and experience the Living God — that’s what’s most important in the indestructible faith! It is only possible to feel this — in the spiritual heart! Then the soul will not doubt that God exists and that God is Love, as Jesus taught!
“And then you can stop ‘being afraid for yourself’: fretting for the life of your body.
“You can stop being afraid for what people will think and say about you… — be it fame, shame, condemnation of the crowd… Those, in whom pride is strong, are afraid of shame and reproach! Words of praise — are pleasant to our pride! And reproaches — cause it pain…
“All of this is feared for one who has one’s own main thoughts and concerns — about oneself! But the soul, strengthened by faith and love for God, is no longer afraid of this!
“There is a belief in which a person blooms so fully to God, so much accepts God’s Will — that he or she is not concerned anymore about himself or herself!
“Jesus Himself died on the cross by a death which was meant for the atrocities of criminals. For us — He accepted it! So that — we could see the possible Great Power of the Soul! For — His words to be remembered! For — us to know that there is no death for the soul, but beyond this threshold — the Heavenly Kingdom will admit the worthy ones!
“And — with joy, Christians were ready to accept a martyr’s death — to follow the Lord!
“So faith can convert any suffering — into purification and transformation of the soul. That’s the power of faith!”
“But why are torture and suffering — the end of which cannot be seen —necessary?”
“… I do not know… For some reason, in a sinful world, it does not happen otherwise… It is evident that, through this, we receive cleansing from sins, and take our eyes off this material world — to look to Heaven and try — in humility — to get an understanding of the Wisdom of God…”
… After a pause, the elder Nicholas added, as if answering the thoughts that had not been expressed aloud by Alexey:
“… Yes, you are right, Alexey, in your thinking that most people believe in stupid things… Living in a blind and fanatical faith, at times, they commit terrible crimes… And, by what they call their ‘faith’, they justify their atrocities…
“Not to the Heavenly Father, the faith of such people is directed, not to Jesus, — but to ostensibly ‘saving’ rules and ceremonies …
“Faith that results from fear — makes man a mindless slave, a blind instrument of those who instill this fear!
“But faith that grows out of love for God — brings a person closer to the Lord!
“So, it turns out that troubles come because the faith of most people originates from fear. They think that, if the wrong ritual is performed, then death awaits them…
“Worse still, many people think that to execute those, who are of another faith, is a feat for which sins are forgiven…
“And there are those, who stimulate this folly in low-minded people and, through that, strengthen their power over the riches of the world, over the vast lands. This is a terrible crime, the greatest sin!
“And it is not only among the Orthodox that such misfortunes multiply… For, the Latins in their countries initiated the inquisition…
“A weak soul is afraid to ‘burn forever in hell’ for ‘not believing so’! And, therefore, it is easy for these villains to command those who are overwhelmed by fears and prejudices!
“Such broken faith sometimes ruins all of one’s life, turning it into despair and meaninglessness. One was believing, and believing — and then suddenly this one is told that it was untrue how he or she has believed, and that his or her faith was wrong and that he or she has to believe in a new way… — and so, faith is broken…
“And people cling to at least some ‘saving’, in their opinion, ‘correct’ faith…
“Weak souls and scanty minds feel lost, if what they believed in is suddenly called ‘heresy’, delusion, crime. It turns out that such a person is facing an unbearable choice: he or she does not know whom to believe now?! It is because the faith of such a person was not deep. And such a person wants more quickly to follow another leader, to switch faith to a new one, to start believing in ‘salvation’ by new rituals…
“Faith is easily broken if there is no love for God and no depth of understanding!
“And the Essence of indestructible faith — this is God Himself! With such faith — nothing is scary!”
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