Contemporary knowledge about God, Evolution, and the meaning of human life.
Methodology of spiritual development.
How God Can Be Cognized/Search
“The soul, exhausted and languishing, requests
drink, drink, drink...
Where to get water to quench one’s thirst?
Source is — it is called the Truth.
But to find it,
One will have to embark on a journey...”
Philip the Apostle, from a conversation with Him.
I began to go to the temple of the Orthodox Church, thinking to find God there. I attended different temples, honestly stood during the services, trying to feel God, confessed and got communions. But nothing worked!
I also found that for the majority of the priests, the service in the church was only the usual work for money — the same as any other job. But I was looking for the Living, the Real God!
When I took part in church ceremonies, I had the feeling that I am taking part in theatrical performances...
I liked to come to a temple long before service when almost none of visitors were there yet... Only during these hours, I felt a special peace — and it was good...
I tried also to pray with the help of the thick book with prayers. But I could take for myself from it only two prayers: “Heavenly King”* and “Our Father”.
Then I began to search and study the books where the information could be about God, meaning of life, how the world was constructed and what to do to help myself and others. But I could not find the information that would satisfy my growing interest in new to me esoteric side of life.
One day, I visited a friend of mine and talked with her son. He was fond of different spiritual literature, and I asked him to show me his books. Among them was the book of Vladimir Antonov “How God Can Be Cognized”. Taking it from his hands and having read the table of contents, I realized: it is — the book which I searched for! Here I will find the answers to all my questions! I asked him to give it to read. He refused, saying that this book already — because of his diligent reading — was dilapidated; the paperback had collapsed. But he can buy for me one more in the same store. And there, by the way, are other books of Antonov. I was very happy and asked to buy all the books by this author.
Having the long-awaited books, I read and imbibed the written — as if drinking from a living source: as a traveler in the desert quenches the thirst, crouches to the long-awaited water...
Having read all, I decided to write a letter to the author. I briefly described my life and thanked him for the books. And I was very pleased when the answer came! He wrote that with a drunkard-husband it is impossible to go to God and that necessary is the ethical work on oneself. And wished me success.
... After two months, my drunken husband departed the earthly life.
Now I had more time to study the books of Antonov.
Intellectually, I at once accepted all that I had learned from his books about God, man and evolution. But I felt the need to start work practically: remake my life and myself, making all in line with the plan of God. But how — I did not fully understand yet.
And I wrote him the second letter, describing the recent events of my life, and asked for a meeting.